My Life in Words


University Student
Wannabe Otaku
Struggling Christian




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Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Running out of what I took for granted

Song of the moment: Sambomaster - Sekai wa Sore wo Ai to Yobundaze (Densha Otoko TV ED theme)

Bokura wa izure dareka wo utagacchimau kara
Semete ima dake utsukushii uta wo utau no sa
Kanashii kotoba dewa OH YEAH
Namimo kawaranainda ze
Yatsura ga nani wo shita tte iunda

Kinou no anata ga uragiri no hito nara
Kinou no keshiki wo wasurechimau dake da

Atashii hibi wo kaeru no wa ijirashii hodo no ai nano sa
Bokura sore wo tashikameau sekai ja sore mo ai to yobunda ze

(A time will come where we have a doubt about someone
But for now I'm going to sing a beautiful song
With sad words, oh yeah
Nothing will change
Are you saying they've done something?

If the you of yesterday was a traitor
Then I'll just forget yesterday's scene

We're changing the new days because this is such an innocent love
And we want to confirm that. The world calls that love)
Sekai wa Sore wo Ai to Yobundaze by Sambomaster

Yes, the clock is ticking. Time is running out for me. In 10 days time, I won't be on the mainland anymore. While most of my church mates will be at the CAC BYM camp at St. Francis Methodist, I will be enjoying the sun, sand and sea at a totally different kind of camp. Where you actually get paid to come to this camp. Not only that, you'll be given free clothes (albeit uniform ones...), free food and free lodging. While it does sound as if I am trying to comfort myself, I am not...(well, at least I am trying to convince myself its not). I've already bought most of the stuff I need for army, save for a few miscellaneous items. Honestly, I don't feel nervous about it or anything (well, not yet), I am just realising how much I'll miss living on the mainland, in a proper home. Well, I'll still be back on weekends but it's just the abrupt change in lifestyle that unsettles me.

Got a rather annoying notice from CMPB, asking me to go back there to take a picture, which I already did during my medical check-up there. After a rather boring and seemingly never-ending (but thankfully direct) bus ride, I went in and was out in less than 5 minutes with my photo successfully taken. A rather big waste of time if you ask me. Hopefully no more last minute annoying notices from anybody.

I met up with YX yesterday for a drink at Starbucks. We had a good talk for about and hour or two about life, NS and stuff like that. I am glad he's still doing alright in the SPF. In a way, YX is still the same Barker YX but more mature, worldly-wise maybe? I am reminded that no matter how grueling NS life is, it'll never change who we are, maybe it'll smooth out certain rough edges or chip out certain parts but the core will always be there.

Went to watch 'Over The Hedge' with MK, MK's bro, Jia Wei and Lester a few hours earlier at J8. MK's brother is apparently the same age as mine, with similar 'characteristics'. Maybe they can be good friends, who knows? Anyways back to the movie, while it wasn't particularly impactful, it was funny. Especially liked the skunk-persian cat romance scene and Hammy the squirrel's caffine high bullet time scene. While the storyline seems somewhat cliche, its still good for a laugh or two...or three...or four... (Rating: 3.5/5 stars).
Hopefully I'll manage to watch X Men 3 and Cars before I leave for holiday resort island...

After inadvertendly spending more time in your presence has made me realise how much I'll miss Singapore mainland. If I could turn back time, I'll definitely have made more effort getting to know you better than I do now. Maybe because, I don't want to be just an acquaintance, not just a friend but...

Monday, May 15, 2006

Feeling Random

Song of the moment: YUI - Life (Bleach 5th ED theme)

kodomo no koro ni modoru yori mo
ima wo umaku ikite mitai yo
kowagari wa umaretsuki

hi no ataru basho ni dete ryoute wo hirogete mita nara
ano sora koete yukeru kana?
nante omotta n' da
tobidatsu tame no tsubasa sore wa mada mienai
kantan ni ikanai kara ikite yukeru

(I want to try living in the present
rather than returning to my childhood
It's my nature to be a coward

If I go to a sunny spot and stretch my arms out,
I wonder if I can go beyond the sky
that's what I thought
The wings I use to fly away are still invisible
It's because it's not simple that I can go on living)
Life by YUI

Can't really express what I am feeling now...okay, maybe I can express it in words. It's kind of like a mixture of emotions. A mix of fear, apprehension, excitement and joy...

I went out with Melvin and KK last Friday. I was really hoping to watch a movie but due to it being a public holiday, the chances of getting a decent seat will be close to nil and not to mention how it'll damage our wallets temporarily. We ended up going for lunch at Lido then proceeded to Pool Junction for some 8 ball. All the while, throughout our outing, we were actually talking about Tekong et al. While I did gain some really useful information about army life, a kind of apprehensiveness kind of landed on me and I really started to actually dread the occasion. In fact it lasted all the way till Sunday and in a way manifested itself when Zhao Yong passed me his old army supplies for me to use. It really hit me right there and then. That I am less than a month away from entering a certain offshore island, where I'll spend four months preparing to serve my country before getting my vocation. Then I'll spend my remaining one and a half years serving my country in some way or another.

Then this afternoon, after looking at the ARMY singlet that Zhao Yong gave me, my emotions took a 180 degree turn. I was actually looking forward to wearing it when the time comes, looking forward to finally start reading "The Rule Of Four" in camp, looking forward to army life in general. Which, now that I think about it, is kind of weird. And now...well, as I said, it's kind of a mixed feeling. I really have no idea how I'll feel come June 9th and 10th.
Anyways, I'll be meeting Jia Zhi on Wednesday to go buy my 'army essentials' at North Bridge Road. Well, not that it has much connection to the current train of thought...

Someone mentioned that I don't really take the initiative. Of course, considering where that comment came from, I of course took it very seriously. While I definitely shouldn't read too much into the statment, it still got me thinking. Should I take the initiative? While the heart is willing, everything else says no. I know all that's at stake and I don't think I'll ever forget(in the near future at any rate) what happened in December 2004. While I've obviously moved on(just to clear some doubters, if any), I've kept the lessons I learned then close to my heart. I've learned to be more sensitive of others and most importantly, to watch what I say (or SMS). As I've said many times before, I am not going to repeat this mistake again.


Wednesday, May 03, 2006

And the days go by...

Song of the moment: Home Made Kazoku - Thank You (Bleach 2nd ED Theme)

Itsumo sasaete kureru hito-tachi ni
Higoro no omoi wo kometa RHAPSODY
APPRECIATION no kimochi yo todoke
Itsumo arigatou hontou arigatou
Tatoe doko ni itatte kimi no sonzai ni kansha shiteru yo

(To the people who have always supported me
I've put you in my rhapsody of everyday thoughts
I hope my feelings of appreciations will reach you
Thank you as always. Really, thank you
No matter where you are I'll always be thankful you exist)
Thank You by Home Made Kazoku

Looks like I am making it a habit of updating every other week. Sometimes, it seems that because of the holidays, things just seem so monotonous that there seems to be nothing worth writing about. Anyways, I am updating now, right? So there still are things worth mentioning in this blog after all...

It seems that nearly all of our local media are now indulging themselves in every morsel of news and gossip coming from the General Election, the political parties and the candidates. In a way, it does make for an amusing read (to see political opponents in a slagging match about their opposition's tactics and policies is somewhat amusing). However, you do wonder will they ever be a time when political parties and their respective candidates campaign fairly and honestly, solely based on their policies and beliefs, without criticizing the opposition? To me, it seems that both sides (in Singapore politics, there are really only 2 sides, namely the OPPOSITION and the _ _ _ [I shan't mention the name save I get arrested for sedition, etc...]) seem to revel in the idea of insulting and putting down their political opponents and (as quoted by the press) 'Making a mountain out of a mole hill'. If you really claim to give people 'a choice', a chance of 'moving ahead', to be 'ready in action', or an opportunity ro 'speak out', focus on what YOU can bring to our country instead of what THEY can't do.
Haha, what do I care anyway? I still can't legally vote and even if I could, there's no opposition challenging in my GRC...

Watched a couple of movies the past few days. Sympathy for Lady Vengeance (on VCD) and The Sentinel (@ GV Bishan). Sympathy was rather good. Director Park Chan Wook at his best (well, can't really say that considering the only other movie of his which I watched was Joint Security Area). Excellent use of symbolism and the dark humor was good. Overall a 5/5 stars.
Sentinel which I watched with Melvin was alright. Considering it was a suspense thriller kind of movie, I expected a little more drama and action in the movie. No other complaints though, plot was well executed and Kiefer Sutherland's acting was good (but not as good as in 24). Overall a 4/5 stars.


Stuff I plan to do before June 10th:

1) Complete at least one of my MG Gundam Models
- I've started building my MG Strike Rouge model. I'll probably be able to finish it before June 10th anyway so no worries here.

2) Watch the VCDs and DVDs which I bought but haven't had time to watch till now - About done, save for Three Extremes and Be With Me.

3) Download and watch Kakashi Gaiden arc from Naruto TV series - This one is out of my control. Not really sure how long more the fillers will go on, but I am hopeful...

4) Win a Premiership title in FM 2005 within 2 seasons without using any of the top 6 teams in the division - Well, that's unlikely considering my current team is Southampton. However, I do have one of the best offences in the premiership but one of the worst defenses...

5) Lastly and most importantly, confess my undying love and affection to _______ and for her to do the same to me and live happily ever after TOGETHER as a loving couple For ______ and I to actually have a decent conversation without getting distracted or interrupted - Hmm, needed a little bit of correction and use of the strike HTML tag but still, the toughest of the lot. Sigh...I will continue to wait for not the OPPORTUNE moment but the RIGHT one.

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